
For four years, I struggled with consistency. Whether it was my personal developmentāmeditation, exercising, eating healthy, readingāor my business, I just couldnāt stick with anything. At the time, I was a full-time software engineer trying to build a business on the side, but no matter what I did, I couldnāt make anything last.š
I would learn something new, get excited, and start applying it. But after a couple of weeks, Iād feel like it wasnāt working. So, Iād move on to something elseāa new course, a new book, a new toolāthinking, Maybe this will be the one that finally works! But it never was. I repeated this cycle for almost four years.
Stupid me. š š
The Breaking PointĀ š
One evening in late 2023, I hit rock bottom. I was frustrated, doubting myself, wondering why I couldnāt do anything consistently. The thought crept in: Maybe I should just quit. Maybe Iām not meant for this. Maybe I should just go back to being an average person. You know, the kind of life where you wake up, go to work, come home, collect a paycheck, survive the month, and repeat this cycle for the rest of your life.
With all these emotions swirling inside me, I sat at the dinner table with my wife and, for the first time, broke down in tears. I told her everythingāhow I felt like a failure, how I was tired of trying, and how I just wanted to give up. I went to bed that night feeling broken. š
The Thought That Changed Everything š
The next morning, as I sat down to journalāsomething I had tried to do consistently but failed at, like everything elseāa thought popped into my head:
What if I just took a breather? What if I stepped away from all this for a week?
I already knew a lot. I had consumed more books, courses, and strategies than I could count. Maybe the problem wasnāt that I didnāt have the right information. Maybe I just needed to stop chasing the next thing and figure out what was really going wrong. š
So, I did. I took a step back, stopped trying to force things, and gave myself space to reflect. And during this time, I realized somethingāa key piece that changed everything. š
The Missing Key š
The second key to consistency is obvious: being consistent. But thatās not where the problem starts. The real issue is that consistency doesnāt exist without the first key. And that first key is this:
You have to alter what you learn to fit your uniqueness.
Think about it. We try to follow strategies exactly as theyāre taught, thinking they will work the same way for us as they did for someone else. But people are different. Our motivations, routines, and lifestyles are unique.
What works for me might not work for youāat least not in the exact way I do it. You have to tweak, adjust it to a point where you can say āI love doing itā.Ā š ļø ā¤ļø
You have to love doing it, or you wonāt be motivated enough to do it tomorrow. And if youāre not motivated, consistency goes out the window. ā
How I Applied This and Made It Work āļø
Once I understood this, I stopped following rigid rules that didnāt feel right to me. Instead, I started adjusting things:
- I tried different times of the day for my habits until I found what worked best for me.
- I changed how I exercised until I actually enjoyed it.
- I built my business in a way that matched my energy levels instead of forcing myself into a structure that drained me.
And suddenly, I was consistent. š„š
When something still didnāt work, even after adjusting it, I removed it entirely and found an alternative. Thatās the keyāadapting and personalizing what you learn instead of blindly following it.
Building the Foundation for Lasting Change š”
Once I had this piece in place, everything started working. But hereās the thing:
Consistency works like a building. You canāt stack bricks if the foundation is weak.
This is where habit stacking comes in.
You donāt start by doing everything at once. You start with the essentialsāthe foundational habits that will support everything else. Once those are rock solid, you slowly build on top of them. š
For me, it started with:
- Meditating right after waking up š§
- Starting my mornings by listening to nature and tuning into my emotions šæ
- Journaling for 5 minutes š
- Exercising for just 10 minutes šļø
I started with the first two, then gradually added the third and fourth one after the other. š
Once I had these habits locked in, I started adding more, one by one, in a way that felt natural to me. Thatās how I built the life I have now.
Final Thoughts š¤
If youāre struggling with consistency, stop looking for the next new thing. You donāt need more informationāyou need to personalize what you already know.
Ask yourself:
- Am I enjoying this? If not, how can I make it more enjoyable?
- Is this realistic for my lifestyle? If not, how can I adjust it?
- Does this fit my energy levels and daily rhythm? If not, what would?
Once you get this part right, consistency becomes effortless. And once you build a strong foundation, you can start stacking your habits and creating the life youāve always wanted. šŖ
This was my missing piece. Maybe itās yours too. š
#consistency #consistencyiskey #consistencyoverperfection
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